The price of self-acceptance, cheating, and living on purpose.

Real Talk vol. 3

The price of self-acceptance can be steep when it requires you to cope with the aftermath of an accident or injury.

It’s been 9 months since my breast explant surgery and it’s taken me this long to get to a place of loving my body again. It was easier for me to motivate others to love their bodies when I didn’t have a major deformity staring back at me in the mirror. I took for granted how difficult self-acceptance can be when the struggle is with things that are out of your control. 

My explant experience was emotionally, physically, and spiritually painful but also very humbling. Thankfully, my physical healing and blossoming midlife wisdom have given me the courage to say, “Fuck it.” 

There is nothing I can do to change how my boobs look, nor would I if I could; I just don’t care anymore. I realize, or rather decided that there’s much more to life and living than worrying about my boobs or lack thereof. 

In time I will write more about my post-explant experience because I want to help other women who are looking for support and encouragement through the process. For now though, I need to distance myself from feeling pressured to write about my boobs. I’ll gladly respond to emails or phone calls should anyone want to connect with me. 

Recently, I wrote about cheating on my husband (spoiler, I didn’t actually cheat, per se). The post came from a very raw place. The hubs and I went through a rough patch but at no time did I intend to cheat on him with another man. The price of that kind of betrayal is entirely too high, however the price of living a lie is nearly as dire.

If you’re married or living with a long-time partner, you know how the stresses of life...finances, illness and ailments, sex, and lack of physical space can take a toll. 

To get us from what felt like a breaking point, I had to take a step back from feeling raw and emotional and examine what’s missing from my life and how much of that should I respectfully expect or demand from my husband. 

I realized that 1. No one is responsible for my happiness except me. 2. My loss of autonomy was my own doing and not his. 

Now that I’ve had some time to let emotions simmer there are a few more pearls I will share in a revision of The Moment I Decided to Cheat on My Husband, (thanks Kay!) so stay tuned. 

The focus of my blog is to provide a space for sharing midlife reflections that are real, raw, authentic, and personal. I’m not the best resource for fashion or beauty tips because half the time I don’t care what I wear lol. These awesome midlife ladies are my go-to resources: 

Check them out sometime. 

Another aspect of the jae hermann blog is to provide motivation and inspiration to live on purpose. The GAWWLOP member-only content is a community dedicated to intentional living.

What’s the secret to living on purpose? How can we squash the bad habit of looking to others for validation or permission to live an authentic life? Upgrade your subscription to gain access and learn more in the first installment, Stop the madness. #DoYou. 

Twice a month, GAWWLOP member-only content will include posts, podcast episodes, downloads, or worksheets that I use with my personal development and biz clients. Perfect for the gal looking to game-up a start-up biz or gear up a blog arsenal. There’s also some nifty GAWWLOP swag!  

It takes a village. A HUGE thank you to my awesome friends and clients who took time to write me a review/recommendation on Facebook

A massively HUGE thank you to my fellow writers who also wrote reviews, especially those whose work I absolutely ADORE and look up to (looking at you Kamga and Jas, I hope to be on your level soon, just watch me because I’m on my way). 

I’m starting (rewriting?) a new life chapter this time with a heavy focus on writing and freelance projects. Being able to showcase positive feedback to my writing and business services on my Facebook page was a much-needed dose of love and encouragement. 

Thank you again to everyone who continue to remind me that I’m not alone in my journey, I know that I can’t do this without you.

That’s all for now. If all goes as planned, you’ll get another Real Talk newsletter-like post from me next week.

Until then, #LiveOnPurpose.

~jae